If it wasn't for Graeme’s wellies where would he be .…?

Today history was made, I finally retired my 29 year old wellies in favour of moving up market to a brand new pair of green, lined with tie at the top cuff Kamik’s.

My old black and very basic wellies had served me fantastically and flawlessly right up to the end for all those three decades. Prior to moving to Nova Scotia, their predominant function was to keep my feet dry during my regular car washings. Those car washings were such a celebrated weekly event that many could confidently set their watches by them …

Two provinces, hundreds of car washes and much more, but now retired.

 

After the Nova Scotia move, the demand upon my wellies spiked to such an extent that they became a permanent fixture at the front door in readiness for any emergency or task. Many times during heavy rain they would be used on random wanders around the empire or more practically, taking the garbage out or trips to the composter. Another application was during grass cutting to protect the bottom of my jeans from the inevitable green staining which annoyingly seems happen now more than ever before.

The last winter challenged my wellies had their biggest test during snow blowing. On just a couple of harsh sessions, they functioned well from the non-slip and good grip requirement, but failed terribly on the insulation properties. Being the very basic model, they had no insulation which left my feet enormously cold … I did use thick insulated socks, but this led to a tremendous and exhausting struggle getting the size 8s’ on ……………. So it was decided before the next winter I would upgrade to a better welly, but before so I would have carefully consider the requirements and specifications ….

One last note on my old wellies ~ recently on a wet afternoon, I was splashing around at high tide in the LaHave River with my wellies. Much to my surprise, I could feel my left foot getting wet, my old wellies had finally sprung a leak. Perhaps this was their message to me that it was time for rest and retirement.

Onto the specifications for the new wellies ….

1)  They had to come with an insulated liner and additionally be big enough to accommodate with ease and comfort thick winter socks.

2)  Be capable of being tied up at the top with a protective cuff. This requirement is mainly from a health point of view to avoid the possibility of contracting Lyme disease. Although this has not happened yet, during grass cutting it is possible for one of those nasty ticks get into a place they are not really welcome. So cuffed and tied wellies will certainly close off one available route for the little nasties.

3)  As mentioned above that I have moved up market with my new wellies. Therefore it is important to actually look like I have stepped up a few levels in the pecking order. I think a good way of achieving this is to have green wellies. Observations over many years have indicated that the upper class gentry tend to wear green wellies and so too the royal’s … so why not me …?

4)  Not ridiculously overpriced, very important for this Scotsman

Research indicates that the Kamik Hunter Boot fills the requirements, this from their web-site ~

“If you’re looking for insulated rubber boots that will stand up to bad weather, you’ve found them with Kamik’s Hunter. Built to perform, these winter rain boots are 100% waterproof, oil and acid resistant, and made to last. If you’re on the hunt for men’s winter boots that are ready for wherever the trail leads, look no further.”

…………… and they are 20% off this week …!!!

 

 

About 25 years ago my old wellies were so popular, a very good friend of mine Dave Weldon (http://sookenaturewatch.blogspot.ca/) reconfigured a well-known Billy Connelly song to me and my wellies ~

 
 

The Welly Boot Song

 

If it wasn't for Graeme’s wellies where would he be

He'd be back at Colditz or maybe Dowty

'Cause he would have a dose of the flu or even pleurisy

If he didn't have his feet in his wellies

 

Oh wellies they are wonderful, oh wellies they are swell

'Cause they keep out the water and they keep in the smell

And when you're sitting in a room you can always tell

When Graeme takes off his lovely wellies

 

If it wasn't for his wellies where would he be

He'd be on the Internet or watching BBC

'Cause he would have a dose of the flu or even pleurisy

If he didn't have his feet in his wellies

 

Oh and when he's out walking in the country with a bird

And he's strolling over fields just like a farmer's herd

And somebody shouts, "Keep off the grass" and he thinks how absurd

and SQUELCH he'll know why farmers all wear wellies

 

If it wasn't for his wellies where would he be

He'd be on the Stock Exchange or infirmary

'Cause he would have a dose of the flu or even pleurisy

If he didn't have his feet in his wellies

 

There's fishermen and firemen, there's farmers and all

Men out cleaning Hondas and working in the snow

This country it would grind to a halt and not a thing would grow

If it wasn't for the workers in their wellies

 

If it wasn't for his wellies where would he be

Talking to Ken 1 and 2 or infirmary

'Cause he would have a dose of the flu or even pleurisy

If he didn't have his feet in his wellies

 

Oh Edward Heath and Wilson they haven't made a hit

They ruined the old country more than just a bit

But Graeme knows the reason why we're no longer in the (shhhhh)

Because Maggie always wore her best wellies

 

If it wasn't for your wellies where would you be

You'd be in the hospital or infirmary

'Cause you would have a dose of the flu or even pleurisy

If you didn't have you're feet in your wellies